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Marriage as we know it is dead.
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Big Fagot
Alpha ape
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 10545
(Wed Oct 16, 2013 9:58 pm)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
I'll probably have children someday. It's fun yelling at things and being bigger than them.
Jason
At ten I shaved my head and tried to be a monk, I thought the older women would like me if I did.
Joined: 28 Feb 2007
Posts: 7600
(Wed Oct 16, 2013 10:06 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
It is fun being fat and posting on FTU.
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Last edited by God on Fri Apr 05, 33 4:00 am; edited 1 time in total
Fagzilla
Got lost in another dimension for a couple months. But seriously, we will actually update the site within the next couple of days. http://www.bandzwiki.com/
Joined: 25 Aug 2008
Posts: 10111
(Wed Oct 16, 2013 10:26 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
Hell yeah, brah!
Derek Payne
huhhhh *puke* huhhhhhuh come on mike save the game *puke*
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 4743
(Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:23 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
It's alright.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Thu Oct 17, 2013 6:24 am)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
With all this talk of babies and babies being murdered and fucked on camera by their teachers, its a true soon of maturity that nobody has posted babyfuck babyfuck

So, please somebody get all immature and shit in a hurry
Sporkism
It's funny that I have a job executing cats and dogs, considering that I AM A WHORE WHO FUCKS FOR MONEY
Joined: 05 Jan 2007
Posts: 5369
(Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:14 am)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
I'm pretty certain my sister will be the first one to get married and have children. That is to say, the ONLY one, not just the first.

What fills me with dread is that my sister will actually have a "real" wedding. I don't even want to attend, much less BE in it. I really cannot fathom a worse waste of money than a typical set of wedding rings and wedding ceremony/reception.
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:52 am)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
*high five over a dead woodland creature*
Fagzilla
Got lost in another dimension for a couple months. But seriously, we will actually update the site within the next couple of days. http://www.bandzwiki.com/
Joined: 25 Aug 2008
Posts: 10111
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 2:49 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
It is a huge waste of money, but you only have to do it once, and it's hilarious.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:43 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
Kind of like convincing your family you are het by booking a ritzy suite, purchasing a shitton of MDMA, fine champagne, and a handful of viagra so you can prove your sexuality by vigorously fucking a twink in front of them for an entire day
Derek Payne
huhhhh *puke* huhhhhhuh come on mike save the game *puke*
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 4743
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 5:18 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
You probably shouldn't be drinking champagne if you need viagra.
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 6:11 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
You should be able to mix drugs and alcohol in whatever combination and quantities you want. We live in America for a fucking reason.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 6:35 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
Fuck yeah, this is America. We have the right to do what the FUCK we want, if ssomeone's got an issue with how we handle our shit, bring it, wwe'll never run out of bullets
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Oct 20, 2013 6:43 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
Storytime with Pat!

Well, I was bored and I remembered this scumbag had bought some viagra and I knew where it was at. So I took a couple of Geriatric Panacea, and attained an uncomfortably hard erection. I didn't really think things through, so I watched an hour long program on the History Channel about some hillbilly that walked a tightrope across a ravine. The damn thing kept on trying to cause my beasts to scurry away for about an hour and a half.

That's all I got
Magic Juan
Joined: 10 Jan 2007
Posts: 8709
(Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:57 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
I went to a nerd wedding this weekend and they played Final Fantasy music as people walked into the ceremony. Everything there was Ace Kendo and tried to show me "funny mod Skyrim" videos constantly.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:24 pm)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
That sounds like a marriage that will truly be till death do us part, as they have to be cognizant of the fact they will never find anyone else

I wonder when she dies if the husband will lay her body in the tub and reenact the Aeris scene

That was a lie, I don't wonder that, cause that's how it's going down
Richard Cristopolis
~~~SNAKE...NOW IT"S MY TURN TO PROTECT YOU~~~
Joined: 03 Feb 2007
Posts: 1859
(Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:54 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
Probably gonna marry this girl.
Seru
Custom titles are for heroes, like me.
Joined: 08 Jan 2007
Posts: 11012
(Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:41 pm)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
I wouldn't say I like kids per say. I can certainly tolerate them, which is the highest praise I can offer a sentient being on this or any other planet. I still have to overcome the minor hurdle of being a certified desperado loner who plays by his own rules before I can think of spawning my own. Being a perpetual motion machine fueled by boundless vitriol and existential nihilism can take a lot out of an individual.
Seru
Custom titles are for heroes, like me.
Joined: 08 Jan 2007
Posts: 11012
(Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:54 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
AND HERE ARE SOME MORE THINGS I HAVE TO SAY IN RELATION TO OTHER POSTS IN THIS THREAD.

Chris, my brother got married twice and he went into debt both times to pull it off. It's a lot less funny the second time.

I was in the wedding party and it was a thoroughly miserable experience for me because it required a lot feigning interest in the process. The video of the ceremony shows me failing to even exert a modicum of effort towards this endeavour. Everybody else seemed to enjoy themselves, though.

tl;dr fuck marriage its 4 idots
MADali
Basically, someone like me is the friend who is watching from afar and shaking one's head.
Joined: 21 Jan 2007
Posts: 6740
(Wed Oct 23, 2013 8:40 am)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
I had to feign interest in my own marriage.
Magic Juan
Joined: 10 Jan 2007
Posts: 8709
(Wed Oct 23, 2013 6:31 pm)
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Post     Re: Marriage as we know it is dead.
The couple who got married were generally interesting and excellent people but all their friends were not so well rounded.

I got drunk before the first round of toasts and then rolled on the dance floor when they starting playing Michael Jackson songs.
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