Dragon Ball Z Uncensored

Clotho · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 11:55 am)

"Seth Petruzelli Destroys Kimbo Slice; EliteXC Star Is the Ultimate Fraud
Posted Oct 4th 2008 11:07PM by Michael David Smith (author feed)
Filed under: EliteXC

The street fighter turned professional mixed martial arts fighter Kimbo Slice showed that he's the ultimate fraud, getting destroyed by Seth Petruzelli tonight with a first-round knockout that took just 14 seconds.

Kimbo was scheduled to fight Ken Shamrock, but Shamrock pulled out with an injury. Petruzelli, who had been scheduled to fight Aaron Rosa on the undercard, was a last-minute replacement for Shamrock in the main event.

Kimbo had a significant size advantage: Petruzelli's fight with Rosa was scheduled to be a light heavyweight fight, so he weighed in at 205.5 pounds. Kimbo, a heavyweight, weighed in at 234.5 pounds. But it didn't matter. Petruzelli simply overwhelmed Kimbo at the opening bell. Kimbo had no business being in the cage against anyone with even a minimal level of MMA skill.

Petruzelli improved his record to 10-4. Kimbo falls to 3-1 and is now revealed as the ultimate fraud."

I'm very amused with this. I can't believe that just as many years as this guy had built his reputation up it just falls through the floor. I also feel really bad for the audience who probably paid boatloads to see Kimbo fight Shamrock, and then saw him get replaced and the replacement proceeded to beat the shit out of Kimbo within 14 seconds of them watching thein attraction.

That's not even enough time to grab some snacks!

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BigJoeMex · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:17 pm)

Kimbo getting put down was hilarious! There were even a few people who said the fight was fixed, but come on. You can't fake taking a punch like that.

Clotho · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:44 pm)

It's so terrible. I was listening to Shamrock sound unsure of himself about the fight on a sports show earlier, and I thought well maybe Kimbo slice is really going to dominate this motherfucker.

Shamrock never even had to leave his bedside to really prove himself. He dialed up a aspiring goon and sent him out to conquer this behemoth.

BigJoeMex · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 3:07 pm)

Guess it's back to physically abusing unfit people for Kimbo now!

cloacal kiss · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 3:08 pm)

"Kimbo falls to 3-1 and is now revealed as the ultimate fraud."

If this is the first fight he's lost, he hardly qualifies as the ULTIMATE fraud, geez.

BigJoeMex · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 3:09 pm)

I guess they call him the ultimate fraud because, as Clotho put it, he lost to a nameless goon.

cloacal kiss · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 3:22 pm)

You know who else was a nameless goon?

Rocky.

johnbuisthegreat · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 4:22 pm)

more like Stallion

BigJoeMex · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 4:45 pm)

I guess the whole thing is about people being disappointed at Kimbo after he seemed to be such an unstoppable monster in his internet fights (one of which he lost, even).

cloacal kiss · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 4:51 pm)

I've got a bunch of party-themed internet porn (In the VIP) where it's a couple dozen beautiful women dancing around and making out in slutty clothes in a club or on a yacht or something, and Kimbo Slice is in a lot of them dancing lazily or pouring champagne on somebody.

I don't think he's ever one of the guys who dicks the girls, but I can't say so for sure.

johnbuisthegreat · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 5:21 pm)

party themed porn?

Servbot · (Mon Oct 06, 2008 5:56 pm)

ALDP, he was the bodyguard for those events. I don't think they paid him in pussy.

cloacal kiss · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 6:02 am)

Well it's porn where over half of the running length is just people partying, John Buis.

bitter gigatron · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 12:06 pm)

I wonder how long you would have to wait before engaging in sex at those type of parties. Is small talk necessary or can you just dive right in?

Also, Kimbo is a faggot but the faggot that beat that faggot is a queer.

Ryoko's Biatch · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 12:36 pm)

I can't comprehend why MMA fans are so profoundly threatened by the existence of Kimbo Slice. It's not like he's the first dude to ever be popular despite the fact that he isn't especially good.

*pulls race card and makes sly, gay face*

cloacal kiss · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 12:44 pm)

If MMA fans weren't retarded they probably wouldn't be investing so much time and interest in MMA.

BigJoeMex · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 4:08 pm)

I'm glad I'm not an avid MMA fan after reading the last couple of posts! Truth be told, I used to be a bit more into it until PRIDE FC was over. Right now I'm in more of a K-1 kick.

Action Hank · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:28 pm)

Kimbo Slice sounds like some type of African-themed pizza.

Servbot · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:53 pm)

It'd go great with a glass of grape drink.

johnbuisthegreat · (Tue Oct 07, 2008 6:05 pm)

so someone link me to a pic or movie of this party porn