Dragon Ball Z Uncensored

[Derek Payne]

PROVIDENCE, R.I. - Rhode Island's education commissioner has ordered a high school to publish a yearbook photo showing a teenager with a sword.

The 17-year-old is a fan of the Middle Ages, so he wore chain mail and slung a prop sword over his shoulder for his senior portrait. Portsmouth High School officials rejected the picture, saying it violated their zero-tolerance policy on weapons.

The American Civil Liberties Union got involved. Its lawyers argued the school has allowed students to pose for more than a decade with props that show their interests, including musical instruments and horses.

A state education hearing officer added that past editions of the yearbook have had pictures of other items banned by school rules, including a corn-cob pipe, liquor bottles, a beer stein, toy guns, arrows and a knife.

[Theldorrin]

So do you people not take archery in gym class or anything?

[Username]

The name of this topic was going to be "Gohan vs. Aochan: The Gayening" in the alternate universe where Derek Payne wasn't a fucking faggot and made the topic with a lukewarm gay news story just to make it before me.

I could have posted it last night with the story of the drunk juror, or the guy who crashed his car, and then stole the truck from somebody who stopped to help him, and who subsequently was defeated by said helper with the aid of a few zip ties.

But I didn't, because I wanted to find a good story.

[Username]

The truck one is actually sort of awesome, just not good gay news, but here it is:

LAKE STEVENS, Wash. - A good Samaritan who stopped to help a car accident victim was nearly punished for his good deed when that accident victim tried to run off with his truck. But it turned out, the car thief had picked the wrong guy.

Clint Lucas of Lake Stevens was driving in Bothell when he saw a car spin out of control and crash into a ditch.

He stopped to see if everyone was OK. But that's when the driver got out and jumped in Clint's new $40,000 Ford truck.

In an instant, Lucas decided no one was going to steal his truck.

"You know I work really hard for the stuff I have," he said. "And I wasn't going to stand by and watch my brand new truck get stolen for no reason. I was trying to help the guy and that's how he repaid me."

So he ran after it and jumped in the back bed.

"And I didn't know how to get him to stop. So my reaction was to kick in the back window," he said.

Lucas, a construction project manager, used his steel-toed boots to break the window while the runaway driver swerved back and forth to try and knock him out of the truck.

"I had some construction plans in the back and I tried to get him to stop by hitting him with them through the back window," he said.

As speeds reached 70 miles per hour, Lucas grabbed a trowel from a bucket of cement and started clubbing the truck thief.

"I think that scared him more than anything, so he stopped the truck at that point," Lucas said.

The frightened driver started running on foot with Lucas right on his heels.

"I ran over and I tackled him to the ground and made sure I had him subdued, while a couple other gentlemen helped me get some zip ties on him," he said.

Lucas and two witnesses zip-tied the suspect and held him until cops arrived.

The truck is now in the shop and Lucas has a message for the man who tried to steal it.

"Don't take a guy's Ford pickup again," he said, "you don't know what's going to happen."

It turns out the runaway driver was wanted on warrants and parole violations. He is in police custody.

[Username]

A 25-year-old man in Mims, Fla., is accused of beating a baby and another young child with his closed fists and threatening to sexually molest the wives of the officers arresting him, according to Local 6 News partner Florida Today.

Darrel Ray Kessinger, of 13 Evergreen Place, was arrested late Saturday and charged with burglary with battery, child abuse, resisting an officer, corruption by threat and resisting without violence, reports show.

Police reports show the incident began about 1:48 a.m. Saturday when Kessinger got involved with an altercation with another man.

Witnesses told deputies that Kessinger turned and struck a 3-year-old child and a nine-month-old baby -- with closed fists, Florida Today reported. A woman put the children in a white Ford Tempo and attempted to leave when Kessinger ran after toward the vehicle, reports show.

Deputies said he punched out one of the car windows, causing both children to receive glass cuts, and tried to drag the woman out of the vehicle before she rode off.

Deputies arrived and chased Kessinger, reports show. Kessinger fought back, threatening the deputies and asking where they lived so he could go to their homes and sexually molest their wives, reports show.

Kessinger was handcuffed and taken to the Brevard County Jail Complex. He remains at the Brevard County Jail Complex without bond, officials said.

[Ryoko's Biatch]

That man is a hero.

[Theldorrin]

A good initial gay news post would have been that religious person who got global warming removed from some schools because it's only a theory.

[Username]

A week or so ago, I was going to write a satirical article denouncing gravity as a mere theory, and introduce an "Intelligent Pulling" theory. I was working out the specifics in my head for about 15 minutes (I was in the shower), and I got a sudden feeling of dread, like I just thought of a particular line that was too good to be my own. It sounded like something straight out of The Onion.

It turns out I read that article 2 years ago.

[Derek Payne]

Satisfy my curiousity. Who is Username?

[Mautty]

Some faggot.

[Stupid Fucking Faggot]

FarNeer.

[Action Hank]

They are both correct.

[Magic Juan]

A bookkeeper for a construction materials company embezzled $6.9 million and used the money to go on a shopping spree that included a 104-acre ranch and a half-dozen talking trees like those in "The Wizard of Oz," federal authorities said Monday.

Prosecutors say Angela Buckborough Platt also bought eight show horses; a fleet of motor vehicles including a 1964 Ford Thunderbird; a house on five acres in Rhode Island; Hollywood-grade cinematic props to decorate her home for Halloween; and a life-size ceramic statue of Al Capone.

Samantha Martin, a spokeswoman for the U.S. attorney's office, said that when friends or relatives asked Platt about her wealth, she told them that she was the CEO of a corporation or that she and her husband had won the lottery.

Platt, 43, of Wyoming, Pa., was charged Monday with one count of interstate transportation of stolen property. She has agreed to plead guilty in a deal subject to court approval, Martin said.

Platt bought six of the talking trees, which were Hollywood-grade cinematic props, for $3,000 each to decorate her home for Halloween, the U.S. attorney's office said. She also splurged on a 20-foot-tall smoke-emitting dragon called "The Slayer," which sported hydraulically powered wings and a "booming dragon roar," authorities said.

[petahjonze69]

they had to be white trash cause everything they bought was awesome! a fucking dragon

[Username]

Diver pokes shark in eye, survives head chomp

SYDNEY, Australia - A diver escaped a 10-foot shark’s attack by poking the animal in its eye after it had already chomped on his head once and was preparing for another bite, witnesses and officials said Tuesday.

Eric Nerhus, 41, was flown to a hospital with serious injuries to his head, body and left arm after the attack Tuesday off Cape Howe, about 250 miles south of Sydney.

The shark grabbed Nerhus by the head, crushing his face mask and breaking his nose, said Dennis Luobikis, a fellow diver who witnessed the attack.

“He was actually bitten by the head down — the shark swallowed his head,” Luobikis said.

The shark, believed to be a great white, came back for a second bite, clenching its jaws around Nerhus’ torso and leaving deep lacerations in his side, said Luobikis.

Shark poked in the eye
Nerhus wrestled free of the shark’s jaws, and later told rescue workers he had poked the shark in the eye, an unidentified worker from the Snowy Hydro Rescue Helicopter service told local media.

Nerhus was pulled from the water by his 25-year-old son and rushed to a hospital, suffering blood loss and shock.

“Eric is a tough boy. He’s super fit,” said Luobikis. “But I would say that would test anyone’s resolve, being a fish lunch.”

Shark attacks are relatively common in Australian waters, home to some of the world’s deadliest sea life. Scientists say there are an average of 15 shark attacks a year in Australia — one of the highest rates in the world — and just over 1 per year are fatal.

[Servbot]

LONG ISLAND CITY, N.Y. A Long Island City public school bus driver is under fire after apparently kicking a misplaced 5-year-old off her bus in the middle of a Queens housing project.

Omar Murray doesn't even take a school bus to get home from school, but a PS-112 school aide in Long Island City mistakenly placed him on one after dismissal on Friday afternoon. But his mother isn't angry because of that mistake, but rather what happened once her son got onto the bus.

"About nine blocks from my house he was thrown off the bus and left with a stranger," Jackelyn Soto, Murray's mother, told CBS 2. "She took him without checking a list."

Murray rode the entire route -- about a mile long -- and ended up at the Queensbridge housing project where he says the bus driver threw him off.

"He said he didn't know my name and then he kicked me off the bus," Murray said.

A woman picking up her own children heard the entire incident happen and took Murray to her home where she contacted his mother. Soto has enlisted a Manhattan law firm, Burstein & Blum, and says she plans to press charges against the school bus driver.

"I believe people make mistakes, but this mistake is unacceptable," Soto said. "Anything could have happened. He may not be here right now."

The Department of Education is now investigating the incident. In the meantime, the school bus driver in question has been suspended and the school aide has been disciplined. The school has also created new rules for putting children on the bus.

[petahjonze69]

hell yeah! that banner

[Mautty]

Skydiver charged with murder after love rival fell 13,000ft to her death
David Charter and Rory Watson in Brussels

Victim's headcam filmed her death
Parachute looked sabotaged, say police





Accused: Els Clottemans allegedly sabotaged her friend's parachute (Marc Gysens)

A married woman who was having an affair with a fellow skydiver plunged 13,000ft (4,000m) to her death after her love rival and best friend tampered with her parachute, police say.
Els Van Doren, 37, fell to earth in a garden in front of a group of onlookers. Els Clottemans, 22, has been charged with her murder.

Minutes earlier the pair had joined hands in a star formation with two other skydivers including Ms Clottemans’s boyfriend, a Dutchman named only as Marcel, who police say was having an affair with Mrs Van Doren.



While he and Ms Clottemans broke away at 4,000ft when their parachutes inflated, Mrs Van Doren, a mother of two, was unable to open either her main parachute or the reserve and crashed to her death in the town of Opglabbeek, Belgium.

Her final moments were filmed by her own head-mounted camera.

Wally Elters, a witness at the aerodrome from which the fatal flight departed, told Le Soir: “I was working on my plane when I heard someone on the ground screaming and pointing to the sky.

“I looked up and saw a black spot falling quickly to the ground. It was wriggling about and it was pretty obvious it was a person.

“Above it were three people in parachutes coming down slowly. Then it hit the ground. It was an appalling moment.”

Police say that video footage taken by Mrs Van Doren as she tried to open her parachute provided evidence that led them to suspect that a fellow club member had sabotaged the equipment. A spokesman said: “A close inspection of the parachutes leads us to believe they had been meddled with.”

An employee at the airfield in Zwarteberg added: “It is very rare for one parachute not to open, but for two to fail is virtually unheard of.”

At Mrs Van Doren’s funeral, about 1,000 people heard her sister deliver a bitter eulogy. “You did all you could during that final jump to save yourself,” she was quoted as saying in the Belgian press. “But someone did not want you to live.”

Ms Clottemans was arrested and charged after a two-month investigation. She denies the allegations but is being held in custody before a court appearance later this month.

Police became increasingly suspicious of Miss Clottemans after discovering the affair between Mrs Van Doren and Marcel. All three had skydived togther for several years.

Ms Clottemans, a secretary, is understood to have attempted suicide hours before being brought in for questioning by detectives for a second time last month. She is said to be suffering from a personality disorder and is receiving treatment.

Police have also disclosed that Ms Clottemans had previously been arrested for attempting to run over an American boyfriend. He escaped injury and she was released without charge.

According to the Belgian media, Marcel tried to arrange his liaisons so that neither woman found out about the other. His affair with Ms Clottemans began a year ago and he would spend Friday evening through to Saturday morning with her.

In the afternoon, he would meet Mrs Van Doren after she had spent the morning working in her husband’s jewellery shop. Their relationship had begun some years earlier and the two would spend the night in nearby Eindhoven, before returning to the skydiving club the next day.

Despite Marcel’s precautions, Ms Clottemans appears to have found out about her rival, although Mrs Van Doren was unaware that he was also involved with her close friend.

A statement from the public prosecutor said: “A thorough investigation of the available evidence and analysis of the motive provide sufficient reason for arresting the suspect. The investigating magistrate charged her with murder, issued an arrest warrant and had her locked up in Hasselt prison.

“In order not to jeopardise the smooth running of the investigation, no further information will be supplied. As has already been suggested in the media, the motive for the crime is most probably in the passionate area. The accused denies the charges.”

[Stupid Fucking Faggot]

Haha, "did all you could to save yourself."

What, flap your arms in midair like Wile E Coyote?

[Big Fagot]

Three men in China have been arrested for murdering two women and selling their corpses as "ghost" brides.

The women were victims of an ancient belief, still alive in parts of Western China, that says young men who die before they are married should be buried alongside dead women.

The couples will then exist as husband and wife in the afterlife.

Yang Donhai confessed to killing a woman he had bought from a poor family for 780 yuan last year. She thought she was being sold into an arranged marriage.

He later sold her corpse for 1,000 yuan to be used as a "ghost" bride.

The 35-year-old farmer, along with two accomplices, then killed a prostitute. They were paid 500 yuan.

A Chinese newspaper reported the arrests and quoted Donhai as saying: "I did it for the money, it was a quick buck.

"If I hadn't slipped up early, I planned to do a few more".

Yang and his helpers sold the bodies to a local undertaker. Police believe he specialised in buying and selling corpses for "ghost weddings".

Yanan police warned the dark trade is more widespread than people realise.