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Something goes down!

 
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Spamdini
Joined: 22 Jan 2007
Posts: 1322
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 5:19 pm)
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Post     Something goes down!
In the Stone Cold Brewery, goons with shaved heads are guzzling down Stevewiesers and getting rowdy. Their leader, Stone Cold Steve Austin, suddenly gets into the face of one of his men.

"Son, did you say I can't jump 100 feet in the air?"

"N-no sir, I didn't say anything like that. I old said that I wanted to find myself a good woman to bring home and beat!"

"Don't try and sweet talk me, you mealy-mouthed sumbitch!"

Austin rips out the man's heart and stomps a mudhole in it before placing it back in the dead goon's gaping chest wound.

"IF ANYONE WANTS TO SEE AUSTIN 3:16 JUMP 100 FEET IN THE AIR, GIMME A HELL YEAH!"

"HELL YEAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" the goons scream in unison.

Stone Cold jumps up in the air. He jumps 100 feet in the air. No, he jumps into the clouds! No, he jumps into outer space!! NO, he jumps all the way to Heaven!!!

Jesus puts down his latte and opens his arms to Austin. "My brother, welcome to eternal peace and serenity. Let me show you paradise!"

"YOU SOME SORTA FAGGOT, SON?!"

Austin puts Jesus in a Stunner position and jumps all the way back down to Earth. The impact causes the Earth to split open and creates a gateway to Hell. Jesus' limp body falls into the chasm before it closes up.

"W...where am I?" Jesus asks himself as he begins to regain consciousness.

"Well well, if it isn't YHWH's son," Satan cackles, licking his fangs in delight. "Assume the position, boy! Your asshole is mine now!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

On Earth, Austin drinks 80 beers and punches Debra until she dies.

Last edited by Spamdini on Sat Mar 10, 2007 8:03 pm; edited 1 time in total
Spamdini
Joined: 22 Jan 2007
Posts: 1322
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 5:19 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
The End
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 6:01 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
Did this really happen?
Spamdini
Joined: 22 Jan 2007
Posts: 1322
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 6:33 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
Sure!
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 7:36 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
Excellent!
Magic Juan
Joined: 10 Jan 2007
Posts: 8709
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 7:51 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
God, Spamdini's entertainment promos are clearly the best.
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:31 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
What is more powerful? The Stunner or the Powerbomb?
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:33 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
Man, I don't even know what to say to a man who can't answer that question himself.
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:35 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
Let's say Steve Austin attempted to Stunner D'Lo as D'Lo simultaneously attempted to Powerbomb Austin.


What would happen?
Seru
Custom titles are for heroes, like me.
Joined: 08 Jan 2007
Posts: 11012
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:41 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
Ace Kendo would stop asking stupid questions.
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:45 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
Fuck you guys.
Big Fagot
Alpha ape
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 10545
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:46 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
I think the realization that the Stunner and the Rock Bottom can be instantly reversed into one another is a powerful moment in any man's life.
Spamdini
Joined: 22 Jan 2007
Posts: 1322
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:47 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
It is true that a Stunner has never legitimately crippled anyone, but it's the goddamn Stunner!
Big Fagot
Alpha ape
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 10545
(Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:51 pm)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
The Stunner is a transcendent technique that can be performed to small effect by a man of small skill, or used by a master to to devastate an opponent.
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Mar 11, 2007 1:15 am)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
Yeah, the most powerful technique is the STUNNER followed by the ROCK BOTTOM. D'Lo's moves are only powerful because he performed them.
Magic Juan
Joined: 10 Jan 2007
Posts: 8709
(Sun Mar 11, 2007 3:12 am)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
We haven't seen the effects of the stunner in the fourth dimension.
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Mar 11, 2007 3:33 am)
Reply
Post     Re: Something goes down!
Scientists are still trying to figure it out.
Captain PUNisher
Joined: 22 Jan 2007
Posts: 1103
(Wed Mar 14, 2007 9:29 pm)
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Post     Re: Something goes down!
YHWH is my favorite name for God.
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Said the Captain PUNisher.
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