Dragon Ball Z Uncensored

[ALDP]

IMHO WTF

[Seru]

These are my favourite types of threads. Higher Voltage has like four threads dedicated to people playing through all the Castlevania games!

Ah, Higher Voltage.

*dreamy sigh*

[Seru]

This is great and I love it.

[Action Hank]

Calvin's hat is so great.

[Jason]

Day Six
Clint Forty: The New Face Of Evil

Traits
Workaholic
Brave
Perceptive
Artistic
Evil

Lifetime Wish
The Emperor Of Evil: Level 10 in the Criminal career track (evil path).

Current Funds
$533



After a quick breakfast of soup, Clint checked the Internet to start him on his career in criminality. After signing up, he immediately desired to work from home, so he spent the morning doing things like hacking people's computers and posting child pornography on 4chan, I guess.



Since he was stir crazy and his athletics skill influences his job performance, I sent Clint to the gym. He jogged there, so I guess he thought he had already met his activity quota, as immediately upon arrival he sought out a total stranger and attempted to mastermind an evil plan with him while some elderly people did cardio. The stranger found this quite boring.



The stranger was nice enough to chat with Clint despite his awkward approach, but as soon as it was Clint's turn to speak, he tried again to mastermind a plan. Things weren't looking good for the two of them, so Clint finally decided to go work up a sweat.



As soon as said sweat hit, Clint wished we had a dryer. Sure, I thought, the upstairs bathroom seemed a bit big. When I bought it for him, Clint could hardly contain his excitement or himself - much like the room's sink, toilet and shower, which were broken, clogged and broken, respectively. It was well worth the fact that the cheapest model still superseded the combined day's income of Andre, Derek and Theldorrin.



Clint trod downstairs, paying little regard to how offensive the other household members found his body odor. It was then that I realized that all of our cheap appliances were having some issues. And while Calvin literally running around the house in his underwear trying to mop up was a nice gesture, it wasn't solving the problem.



It's been a long time since the end of The Manly Forum, so in case you've all forgotten what masculinity looks like: it's this.



After a triumphant bath, Clint was tired, but he still wanted to improve his athletic skill, so he took a nap and went downstairs, kicking Psaturn off the couch in order to work out in front of the TV. His athletic skill leveled up, but since he was still wide awake, and now wished both to go for a jog and to meet someone new, I sent him to the park.



Unfortunately, by the time he got there, it was 5 AM and the park was empty. I tried to get him to pose sitting forlornly on the edge of the fountain, but instead he got it in his head to play chess with himself.



Finally, people began to appear, but as they came, Clint began to crash. I prepared to send him home to sleep, then suddenly received notification that his carpool was due to arrive in an hour. With no time to rest in his bed, Clint himself volunteered to do what was right, rather than what was comfortable. He napped on a park bench. There have been, I reflect as I watch him, more auspicious first days as a criminal.
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[Seru]

It's like looking at a page of my journal. Except the part where I make up a phony journal to ease my way into a snarky comment.

[Jason]

Day Seven
Calvin Servbot: Flirting While Rome Burned

Traits
Flirty
Commitment lssues
Good
Schmoozer
Friendly

Lifetime Wish
Heartbreaker: Be the boyfriend of 10 different Sims.

Current Funds
$363



Calvin wanted to become friends with someone, so he spotted our whore maid on her way out and employed the conversational options he gets from being a Schmoozer to good effect, while green stink clouds swirled around his upper body and our house basically crumbled down behind him.



Presumably out of frantic need to get out of our sinking ship of a home for as much time as he possibly could, Calvin actually wished for two different careers: education and law enforcement. Thinking he'd perform better as a charming black teacher rather than a hard-nosed Uncle Tom cop, I went for the former.



I attempted to have Calvin take a bath before he left for the "community school," but as soon as he got into the tub, Mike walked in on him. Calvin got out, unrefreshed, as Mike rushed into Psaturn's room and pretended to stretch. People walking in on Calvin bathing was now becoming such a frequent occurrence that I'm forced to conclude that it's Calvin's fault. I'm not sure if you can see the green stench wafting through the air behind him as he enters the school, but if you can: know that his vanity is to blame.



Hungry, Calvin grabbed some leftover waffles and ate them sitting at our computer, because, with all three of our sinks broken, the dining table was completely covered in dirty dishes and flies. Elsewhere, Theldorrin mourned our broken television while the maid, hours after announcing she was done for the day, captivates half of the household with her wiles, including Derek, who probably just misses TV or is surreptitiously using the moment to stare at Matt.



Once the group around the bathroom cleared away, Calvin and Theldorrin engaged in a brief race to the bathtub. Calvin, with his strong, athletic body, won and was finally able to wash himself, but not without Theldorrin staring a hole in the wall at him with his furious laser eyes.



Calvin was stir crazy, so I got him out of our awful house and sent him to the beach. There, he struck up a conversation with an elderly woman but quickly found himself so bored by her that he literally collapsed where he stood. She helpfully walked away, while a bald stranger (whom some self-satisfied Arrested Development fan on The Sims 3 development team had named 'Gobias Koffi') looked on Calvin in disgust. Imagine if he hadn't bathed!



When he returned home, all Calvin wanted to do was sleep. But the maid was still there, talking to any house member she could ensnare. I kept Calvin from his room (now replete with sweet orange light) in order to ask Kate whether or not she was single (I would have sworn that his word balloon was not out of frame when I took this picture). To no one's surprise, she said she wasn't, and Calvin instantly wished to kiss her.



So Calvin told a couple of flirtatious jokes before flirting with her outright, which accomplished nothing but upsetting Matt. Meanwhile, our house continued to slowly flood and Andre passed out in the bathroom.
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[Servbot]

Why the hell do we have a maid? What does she do all day?

[Action Hank]

Apparently, she likes to talk with you dudes.

[Jason]

Day Eight
Mike Payne: Smooth Operator

Traits
Loner
Good Sense of Humor
Inappropriate
Family-Oriented
Eccentric

Lifetime Wish
Professional Author: Earn $4,000 a week in royalties.

Current Funds
$194



Mike woke up disgusted by his "vile surroundings," so I finally called a repairman who (to my surprise) fixed every appliance on the first floor of our home (oddly ignoring the upstairs bathroom) for a fifty dollar fee. Victoriously, Mike pissed in the toilet and then cleaned the toilet, as Clint became to first person to use our dining table in days once the flies had cleared away.



Spending most his morning working on a trashy novel, Mike leveled up his writing skill and registered as self-employed at city hall. Mike is pretty boring so far.



Since Mike was stir crazy and I had no desire to watch him work on his novel for the rest of the day, I sent him to the library. He first wanted to read something, probably hoping they had a manga section, but I had him introduce himself to a young black woman, Monika, reading alone. She tried to chat with him but he was quickly bored, so he started talking to her about Derek, presumably outing him.



After a bit more chatting, Mike thought it would be a great idea to mock the face of the woman in scrubs sitting behind them. Monika found this impolite.



Monika attempted normal conversation with Mike again but the elder Payne couldn't stand her banality and ran towards a bookshelf, leaving Monika to silently and guiltily appraise the woman he had insulted.



Fatigued from a long and productive day of announcing that he was a writer now and then coolly socializing, Mike became a bit smelly and thus wished to own a washing machine (to correspond with our thus far useless dryer). The cheapest model cost more than the entire bonus Clint had received for his promotion earlier that day, so Mike took a bath while looking smugly satisfied that he'd curtailed our house's only windfall.

P.S. Then Mike broke the bathtub.
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[Jason]

Day Nine
Andre Robinson: Collapse

Current Funds
$56



As the Sun rose on our home, I granted Andre's wishes to clean the sink, do the dishes and mop the bathroom. It may be degrading, but damn it: it made him happy. Following that, he sat down next to Derek, watching television, to read a medical book given to him by his boss. This was an opportunity he received earlier in the week.



Just as he finished reading, his carpool arrived. Enthused by the job performance bump he received by completing his opportunity, I had Andre work hard that day. Unfortunately, that drove the already sleep-deprived man to peak physical exhaustion, and it was all he could do to take a needed shower upon returning home.



I thought it was time to do something truly nice for Andre, so (cancelling his actions to mop and wash dishes) I sent him to wake Calvin from an afternoon nap and try to get that friendly hug for which he still pined. Unfortunately, as shown in the picture, Andre's polite desire to ask about Calvin's day was literally obscured by Calvin daydreaming about our slutty maid. Also pictured: Matt daydreaming about Clint, and Clint daydreaming about television. Love Stinks had it right.



So Andre passed out as Calvin giddily jaunted away.



Too tired to even clean the toilet, I had Andre take a nap on the couch. However, before he'd even reached R.E.M., Psaturn turned the television on. Andre woke up and, in his agitated delirium, turned it off. Psaturn was not sympathetic.



Desperately, Andre tried to clean the toilet again. He flushed it during the process, which caused it to break down. This was all Andre could stand.



Andre marched into Calvin's room and woke him up, Calvin having already settled in for the night. Calvin stood in his underwear as Andre rapidly asked him about his day, talked about movies, told him stories and gossiped. Andre was going to get that hug.



Having passed out in mid-conversation, Andre came to and woke Calvin up again. It was all worth it, however, when Andre broke the threshold of friendship and our two tired young black men at last embraced.



In gratitude, Andre made Calvin's bed. Then did the dishes. Then mopped. Then passed out again.
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[Jason]

Day Ten
Derek Payne: It's A Dirty World

Current Funds
$1,032



Beginning his day bright and early with a shower and helpful laundry load, followed by mopping up the puddle around the first floor bathtub his brother broke, Derek wasted no time in performing recompense for hiring our moneysink (and dicksink) maid a week ago.



So I had him stop that shit, because he had an opportunity. In a plot befitting an uninspired first chapter of Vampire, a local politician had his eye on Derek and wanted him to improve his charisma skill. Here, Derek stands before his mirror and vainly emulates holding a cocktail and making droll conversation at a fancy gay party for homosexuals.



Running late for work as a ballot counter, and in light of the fistfight that he had with her husband last week, I chose to have Derek suck up to his boss and run errands for her all day.



Upon returning home, Derek got it in his head to buy that stupid Gnubb game that Theldorrin had pined for. Spending nearly half our assets on it, he and Psaturn rushed outside to give it a shot. In the most true to life moment of Friends Together United so far, Psaturn became distracted before the first game was over and started making funny faces with Matt, leaving Derek to finish playing alone. Elsewhere: Andre is practically dead.



After a quick but necessary nap, I sent Derek back to the mirror to finish upping his charisma, only to have him meet the threshold and then be told by the game that meeting the next level required him to have at least one friend! Being the only other person awake in the house, he called Mike over.



Derek opened with a familial hug, which Mike accepted warmly, then smiled at him like a serial killer (how many poor Sailor Sentai action figures have seen the face Derek is now seeing, just before they were torn from their packaging and violently thrust against Mike's gnarled penis?).



They became friends, so Derek immediately shooed him away and went back to the mirror. Unfortunately, he still couldn't get to the next charisma level, for whatever reason I'll have to figure out later. Despondent, he went to bed. Mike, meanwhile, became aware of the fact that his only brother had just manipulated and preyed on his affections in order to advance his own political career, so he threw Andre out of the room and desperately tried to wash away his agony by taking a sponge bath at the kitchen sink.
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[Theldorrin]

These people spend money like Vinny.
_________________
@}-,-'- *~*~* Member of the FTU Elegant Tea Party Society *~*~* -'-,-{@

[Jason]

Day Eleven
P. Saturn: My Happy Place

Current Funds
$860



Psaturn (the real one) told me in the chat that he has brown hair and a beard, so Psaturn (the simulated one) spent that morning growing facial hair.



Seemingly overcome with testosterone, Psaturn now wished to get a tattoo. So he went to the salon and introduced himself to Sunset Valley's tattooist, Abraham, who was simultaneously enthusiastic, creepy and stoned.



Immediately regretting his decision as soon as the still very happy Abraham had him under the needle, a terrified and vulnerable, nearly naked Psaturn reverted to a psychological safe zone: thinking about how hungry he was.



Taken to the tattoo editor, I had a long think over how best to express Psaturn's personality through the medium of body art. Then, I put a flaming skull on his chest and a butterfly on top of it. Abraham seemed oddly unsatisfied by my work. Psaturn loved it, though. I could tell.



Thinking he'd like to show off his tattoo, I bought Psaturn a dresser so that he could change his nightwear to shirtlessness. Then, after hiring a repairman since both our shower and tub were broken, he called up our maid, Kate, whom he still desired to befriend. She accepted his invitation.



As Psaturn greeted our trollop, he spoke only of her. She responded by thinking only of herself.



Standing in the center of the living room, among the bustle of our house, their conversation was at first laborious and awkward. I cannot accurately represent here the moments where nothing was said and Psaturn could do naught but stand before here, laughing nervously. Just then, however, there was an unexpected exchange of a single compliment, and the conversation drifted to flirtatious. With the help of this boost, Psaturn finally became Kate's friend. Unfortunately, the pressure now seemed to bear down on Psaturn, and he left her alone and head to the dining table to lick clean a dirty plate. Kate meanwhile excused herself and roamed outside, looking through our window as she walked past, thinking of her new... friend.



A few things happened. Psaturn joined Mike on the couch and they watched television together. Kate went outside to play a solo game of Gnubb (make yourself at home, why don't you?). Matt, sensing she was near, found her and started chatting. Then, Clint raced outside and immediately got into an actual, physical fight with her. Clint won. Matt watched with uncharacteristic pleasure. I guess he was glad Clint hadn't called her fat or something.



Fulfilling an opportunity, Psaturn visited a local art gallery. He emerged afterwards tired and probably a little depressed, but I was told his next painting would benefit from his venture.



Moving his last painting to the wall and selling his second, the duplicate of his first, for a cool five dollars (that easel's already made us a tidy -$295 profit!), Psaturn began his latest work. Which, I can only imagine, would be an embodiment of the hurt, desire, fear and myriad other conflicting emotions he felt towards Kate.



Then he stopped to take a nap.



Battling fatigue, hunger and hygiene, Psaturn completed the piece. It was titled, simply, The Maid.
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[Jason]

Day Twelve
Hector Dorrin: The Fires Of Friendship

Current Funds
$1,453



Theldorrin currently out earns everyone else's hourly wage by more than double, so I didn't feel bad about buying him a new candle when he woke up complaining about his room's darkness, nor a new bed when he complained of a poor night's sleep. He took a shower after waking up, and subsequently complained about the poor shower quality. I sent him to his room for a quick nap in order to claim the new bed as his and prepared to upgrade our shower. Just then, however, an alarm sounded and a cloud of black smoke rose over the house. Someone had started a fire.



As the rest of our household screamed in panic (or stood around with callous disregard, Clint), Theldorrin slowly rose, oblivious to the hellish inferno on the floor below him.



Contrary to what I just wrote, it was actually Clint alone who had the wherewithal to extinguish the fire, banishing the flames before the firefighter Theldorrin finally managed to call even arrived. With no fire to put out, the firefighter was content to instead ignite the spark of group conversation - so the household members all stood around the smoky kitchen and had a chat. Unfortunately, Andre was still on fire. More unfortunately, when I sent Theldorrin down there to do something about it, I found that the bacchanal that had begun was blocking Theldorrin's way.



I attempted to sell the buffet table, but found that I couldn't enter Buy Mode while a fire was still active. So, with no other option, I broke a self-imposed rule and moved control over to Clint in order to save Andre's life, as Theldorrin watched on in impotent horror.



Finally, Andre was saved, though charred. Clint looked upon his ashen figure with satisfaction, and Theldorrin smiled in relief.



It was only then (well, only a little bit after then, after I granted Theldorrin's wishes to do the dishes and clean the counter) that I realized he was missing work.



Arriving home, Theldorrin wanted to watch television, but the set was busted. Luckily, he also wished to increase his handiness skill, so he took the opportunity to repair it himself. Meanwhile, I replaced our stove with the next model up after learning, to my surprise, that our last hadn't been the cheapest one available. Outside, Clint celebrated a successful day of heroism by pissing himself.



With nothing else to do or afford at home, I sent Theldorrin to the library hoping that they would have a Handiness manual. They didn't, but he now wished to read something, anything, so I sat him down with a novel titled Game Of Thorns because that sounds like the sort of stupid shit he'd actually read. It wasn't a moment later, however, when another man entered the library and picked the chair opposite. Theldorrin was now sitting next to Yogurtman.



After a pleasant introduction, Theldorrin quickly realized that he and Yogurtman shared the Bookworm trait. Theldorrin attempted to capitalize on this by criticizing a book he hated, which upset Yogurtman. He then praised a book he found fantastic, which further mangled their budding friendship.



Just then, Theldorrin discovered another trait they share: Computer Whiz. They enjoyed speaking to one another about computers until they both found themselves getting tired. Before they parted, they officially became friends; Theldorrin then excused himself and returned home to sleep. Yogurtman went to the library's restroom and clogged the toilet.
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[ALDP]

Theldorrin is planning something, I can tell!

[Theldorrin]

I feel that Yogurtman came far closer to death in that tale than TL...
_________________
@}-,-'- *~*~* Member of the FTU Elegant Tea Party Society *~*~* -'-,-{@

[Servbot]

Psaturn's Sim is definitely going to commit suicide soon.

[Jason]

Day Thirteen
Matt Hall: Master Of Ceremonies

Current Funds
$90



Matt is the only member of the household to not even have the slightest semblance of a job, so I don't know why exactly I spent nearly half our money this morning buying him a cheap ceiling light after he complained of darkness. I do know, however, why I indulged his request to throw a party at which he could serve a meal he made himself. It is because parties are awesome. So from the list of our communal acquaintances I invited the maximum number of people, ten, which included Kate the maid, Yogurtman, some asshole I've never seen who apparently is Calvin's best friend, and a teenage boy Mike met online (can't make this stuff up!). As before, the earliest possible time was nine in the morning.



It was soon a party.



Matt worked on serving some pancakes as he desired, while the only other two members of the house that weren't at work, Mike and Psaturn, slept in their rooms, away from the hazards of socialization. Kate cleaned a counter, either out of habit or from a desire to be close to Matt, while the male maid the agency sends to in lieu of Kate whenever she's too busy flirting with us mopped up behind them. I really hope someone gets off work in time to be able to pay him, because between the light, pizza and pancakes, we're down to a bankroll of eight dollars.



The pancakes were finished and Matt's wish was complete. Unfortunately, by the time they were ready to serve, nearly every guest had gone, politely commenting that the party was "nice." All that remained were the fat Indian that is Calvin's best friend and Kate. Mike emerged from his room once the coast was clear, so they all sat around and ate pancakes.



People returned home from work, two of whom earned promotions and bonuses, so I replaced our broken kitchen sink with a significantly better one. Meanwhile, Matt played a game of Gnubb with Theldorrin.



Matt was stir crazy, so for lack of anything better to do, I sent him to a public swimming pool.



Lexy was there, so Matt swam over to her and gave her a friendly splash. They played a game of who can hold their breath underwater the longest, and Lexy won, probably because she's so used to being smothered under the hefty taint of Chris Psaros. This, however, awoke a competitive streak in Matt and he now wished to best her at any game he could.



So they went to the park, and engaged in a battle of wits.



Sensing quickly that he was losing, Matt excused himself from the game and ran to the other side of the park to eat a hamburger. Lexy, rejected and alone, ran away.
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[Jason]

Day Fourteen
Clint Forty: Hard Day's Night

Current Funds
$1,425



Beginning his day with a career opportunity, Clint jogged over to city hall to deliver a suspicious package. It was surprisingly uneventful. So then he wanted to eat at the bistro, so he jogged over there, only to find it wasn't open yet. A little boy saw him and decided to bend his ear.



They ended up playing tag.



And so Clint ate a lovely salad, satisfied that he was now better friends with a toddler than he was with over half of his roommates.



Clint had a wish to purchase something that cost over $250, so I bought him a new bed. Unfortunately, when he went to his room to try it out, his path was blocked by the immovable boulder that is Calvin's macking.



Andre, sensing an unclaimed bed in the house, rushed into the room, only to be beaten to rest by the mighty Clint. Theldorrin, in turn, came upstairs just to see what all the commotion was. Then, there was a party.



Andre collapsed and everyone was concerned. Save for Clint, who dreamed of fishing.



Upon waking, Clint traveled downstairs to piss. Calvin, who by now very clearly has some sort of sexual proclivity involving being exposed in the bathroom, followed him.



As Clint had no other grantable wishes other than to improve his performance at work and earn a raise, I bought him a football so that he could improve his athletic skill. Grabbing his closest friend, Matt, he initiated a game of catch, which involved repeatedly chucking the football directly into Matt's stupid, pretty face.



When night came, it was time for Clint to go to work. It was only after I saw him change into his new uniform that I learned with horror and dismay that level three on the Criminal career must apparently be "Male Prostitute."



By quittin' time, Clint had been arrested. He sat in the passenger seat on the way to jail, either because his arrest was old hat by now, or the officer needed a quick manny-hanny.
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